In need of guidance and advice

[hunterdoom]

hi i am 33 years old this year i feel i am not very fortunate in life
my mother suicide by jumping when i was in pri school from then i fall behind on my studies in secondary school i was in nt stream back then i did not have a good mentorship from my single dad as he is not highly educated he advice me to study hairstyling course and be a hairstylist back then i was not into studying so i went to study hairdressing for half year i played punk and did not attended most of the lesson in the end they did not accept me into the traineeship program so i went to ns when i was 18. Ns was a hard time for me as i am socially introverted and that was the hardest 2 years of my life.

when i finish Ns i figured i wanted to continue studying so i went to ITE to study IT course end up i finish it and got a 2.8 gpa so i could not qualify into any polytechnic course so i decided to interview for a few IT positions almost all did not call me back as i have no experience so i gave up and i try to find any job that don't require much human interactions as i was an introvert end up i found one which is pasting stickers on product in a warehouse i worked there for 2 years they increase my salary from $1400
to $1700 but i feel exhausted and jaded as the job got alot of overtime.

I went to seek for a higher paying job and found one by chance through a recruitment firm it was a store assistant/technician job i feel really happy working there so i work for 3 years they increase my pay to $2100 but somehow i feel there was a greener pasture on the other side
so i resign in 2018.well that was not a good move.

I manage to interview and get into a few jobs but all i quit due me being introvert and don't gel with my colleague by then i ended up with depression and anxiety i was telling myself that i was a loser for not going through with the job

In this period i also apply for part time diploma and got in but i got to meet some pretty mean people there calling me a loser in life and as i was in a depression i decided to dropout

Currently i am doing grabfood to earn an income but everyday when i wake up i ask myself what am i doing with my life? is this it? i am going to do grabfood for the rest of my life really seems daunting

when i will be 35 i will received some insurance money from my moms passing. I want to use the money to take up a private diploma in kaplan
do you think it's the right thing to do? need some advice

Not a studying advice but it seems to me that the events that happened in your life is quite similar, have you ever thought that what had happened is actually life telling you something? If you give yourself some time to think about why certain encounters you met with were direct confrontations on your weaknesses or fears, and it just keeps on happening, would it be better to face your demons?

Unless you can truly find a job without any human interactions, the problems you currently possessed will still persist unless you do something about it.

The problem is not your qualifications, but your social skills.

For example there are many successful people with low qualifications doing insurance, property agent, etc or becoming towkay. Making money using their good social skills.

You need to be less introverted, learn to get along with people. Make friends with those in high positions which can help you advance in your career and life.