Hi hi,

Every family is different and then there is the generational / educational factor. For example, the mental model of my parents' generation was to have the children look after them in their old age, financially and otherwise. The trend then was to have many children in the hope that at least one if not all would do well enough to take care of them. Many people of that generation also tended to have lower education. So I supposed they also earned less and depending on their children for support was the only practical choice.

Fast forward to my generation (in our 50s to early 60s), the mental model of the better educated ones is now to be financially independent in our retirement years. We recognized that our children will face a more competitive work environment with high cost of living. And we don't want to add to their burden, to have to depend on them for financial support. What we wished for is for our children to independent and successful in their lives. Any allowances from them are just icing on the cake.

However, for the lower educated ones among my peers, I understand their mental model is the same as my parents' generation. They still depend on their children for financial support. I know it is tough on the children. I know because I supported my aged parents and children. That is why I am very determined to be financially independent of my children when I retire. They should not have to be burdened in this respect.

Having said that, do not cause your parents grief. Try and understand them and their needs. After all they brought you up.