I do want a promotion to the next grade. But that isn't the greatest desire. My greatest desire is to go back to the industry to fight battles! I am not sure if you know how it feels, but the multiple rejections, most saying that what I am doing now isn't relevant is demeaning, demoralizing and a total dent to whatever ego I am left with.

In the industry, I close deals, I run projects, I motivate teams... I mean, I am a go-getter and an important contributor towards my organization's bottom line. The work was tough, but in turbulance, I found satisfaction. I developed camaraderie with the people I worked with. I collected war stories that I could tell my child when he is older.

And then I decided that I wanted to slow down for a while, went into regulatory work for 5 years and never found my way out. Nobody told me 5 years ago that THIS was what I signed up for.

I feel like the spartan who asked to be transferred to the spartan BMT school as an instructor so that I can recuperate from years of war. When I am ready to re-join the 299 spartans, I was told that I no longer have what it takes. How sad....