Hi guys new to this forum

Am sailing on the same boat as many of you here

Was 25 when I resigned from the govt sector. Left due to terrible environment and dirty politics. Got back stabbed by a colleague working under me. And boss, no need to say haha.

Mental and physical health affected so badly that I was referred to counselling but didn't go cos of work and studies. I had another colleague who was gg for counselling too so you can imagine my workplace. I was doing my part time degree at that time and I flopped 4 modules and deferred after which cos I was emotionally and mentally drained by all the **** at work. And most importantly cos, I used to spend all my weekends doing office work at home. On weekdays, I used to sleep past 2am doing excess office work at home. No time to do my school work, hence grades went down.

Went thru hell at work, reputation, self esteem, confidence all collapsed as I got into the mindset that I was unproductive and served no purpose in the office as I wasn't respected due to my absence at work which was caused by work itself. To the point I landed in A&E cos of anxiety and depression.

That was the pushing point for me to resign as I realized its no longer worth it. But I must say, my higher management was really supportive and empathised with me. But I had no choice cos the team I worked with was the killer.

So yeah, I resigned in Oct 2016 and it was a sense of immense relief. But it didn't last long. Starting Feb 2017, I've been applying jobs and I got to realise the market was even more terrible than last time, pay is peanuts. My Degree has been on halt since and thus I'm only offered Diploma or O level pay which is pathetic compared to my $2k plus pay in govt. Learned to suck it up and I've lost count on how many hundreds of jobs i applied, confirm more than 500 at least in the last one year (2017).

Been called for interviews here n there, which is less than 10. That too for contract short term jobs, perm ones maybe one or two and the job scope is not suited to my experience and liking. I've missed out temp job offers cos the pay was too too low. I had believed at tat time if I could wait longer I can land perm roles but not true.

It's been 16 mths now and I haven't gotten a job be it perm or contract. Recruitment agencies are also hopeless cos once they know ur market hit rate they don't bother calling you.

Its been a hell ride but with good moments and experiences too. And I'm grateful for all that I've learnt. - tolerant with insults and perserverance.

Hoping to see the light soon. I feel better to be able to share about me to yall as I believe you can relate and not judge unlike our circles.

All the best to everyone of us looking for a job.