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22-12-2022 01:47 PM
Unregistered Since young, I get nervous very often and very easily. I didn’t know it’s social anxiety until quite recently.

I would panic when we have to do self-introduction in group setting. My heart literally thumps so hard and loud when it’s getting to be my turn that I was worried others could hear it.

I get anxious and nervous even when ordering food because I have this great fear of rejection.

I went through A level, diploma and degree programmes and all these required frequent presentations. I got stomachache before every presentation because I was always stressed and nervous. It could be as frequent as 7 presentations in a month.

And my social anxiety continues until today.

Like what some have mentioned, presentations are a must in most jobs. So I just grit my teeth and go through it whenever I have to do it.

I knew I get nervous easily but I didn’t know this is social anxiety.

Age is your advantage but you must seize the day and try to upgrade yourself. You can only get a $4k-$5k job if you have a degree. Work towards a diploma. Tell yourself that this is what you must go through if you want that pay. The discomfort is temporary but the qualification is permanent.

Hope you have taken steps to work towards what you want.
19-12-2022 11:01 AM
Blueberry Hi, my reply is late but I want to tell OP that I too have social anxiety.

But I guess perhaps mine is still not as serious as OP. I have problems communicating with ppl. My previous jobs are those either 1-1 (boss and me only) or if I am in a bigger company, I always lunch alone. I tried to join my colleagues for lunch but was embarrassingly ostracized by them after that due to my 'too quiet' nature or my vibe that make ppl want to shun me.
I didn't know it is 'social anxiety' until recently I start reflecting on myself. I only feel confident when I am alone. Infront of a group of ppl, I will slowly get anxious and feel that I need to be talkative which just give me the stress and more anxiety.

Funny thing is when I go lunch with just one colleague, I can start talking confidently though there are times when I run out of things to talk abt. Ppl will see me as a 'weird person' and even 'creepy'.
But I try not to let those get me down. I got by by engaging in my hobbies, going out to join group classes etc. Get comfortable with strangers, and get comfortable with feeling uncomfortable with ppl.

What I meant to say is, you will have to work with ppl and work around ppl your whole life. If you can go out to buy food from a food stall owner without anxiety, you CAN WORK AROUND PPL.

Slowly one step at a time. I believe everyone has social anxiety to a certain degree.
24-02-2021 06:53 AM
fhoneys
Quote:
Originally Posted by joblessUncle36 View Post
1) IT is a big sector. If you like assembling PCs, web development and design, those are quite distinct areas of IT. You should narrow down an area which you are really keen to pursue first.

Assembling PC: Anybody can do this and like it or not, you will face competition from foreigners for these jobs. In addition to IT graduates from the ITEs / Polys. Even if you stay one for 10 or 20 years, your salary will probably peak around 3k

Web Development: You mean coding? Then you need to ask yourself whether you really like programming. It is one of the jobs which doesn't need you to work with people, but it isn't for everyone and it isn't uncommon for many to drop out halfway through their studies

Web Design: These skills are easy to pick up on your own on Udemy, Coursera etc.

I really think you should narrow down which area you want to invest you time and money in first. Good that you are trying out the Udemy course, which employers will not look at, but it should help you in deciding your area of focus.


2) Will private diploma / Professional 'O' Level cert get you far?

Looking at the number of graduates with 'real' diplomas from the Polytechnics and ITEs, who are now also wondering if they can compete with the equally jobless fresh local university graduates, do you think the private diploma will help you land a job?

However, if the school running the private diploma /cert is reputable and you really believe it will help you build up useful skills, then it is worth considering.


can i ask how do u know if a private cert is reputable? i dont really understand what singaporeans mean by this. thank you!
23-02-2021 04:23 PM
EthanScott I can completely understand and relate to your state of mind. I was going through exactly the same phase where I had a lot of issues at work and people mistook my social anxiety and also most of them took advantage of the same. That's when I didn't know whom to talk to and how do I deal with the situation and progress in my career without being shattered. That's when I knew about EMDR therapy in Singapore. One of friend educated me about this, then I have seen an expert counsellor, it did cost me some money however it helped me bounce back and attain a better state of mind and grow in my career. Now I pursue a few courses parallelly and freelance for a few of my clientele.
09-07-2020 07:10 PM
Unregistered
Quote:
Originally Posted by Unregistered View Post
Just go geylang to open your legs. It’s so simple and good $$. It’s one to one which your social anxiety need not worry. It’s not big group. 😍
what is the current rate?
09-07-2020 06:30 PM
Unregistered Look on the bright side TS, at least you aren't in heavy debt like this guy here, he has more reason to kill himself.

prolificskins.com/post/2018/08/14/business-failed-and-landed-heavily-in-debt-is-a-2nd-chance-ever-possible
08-07-2020 06:16 PM
joblessUncle36 1) IT is a big sector. If you like assembling PCs, web development and design, those are quite distinct areas of IT. You should narrow down an area which you are really keen to pursue first.

Assembling PC: Anybody can do this and like it or not, you will face competition from foreigners for these jobs. In addition to IT graduates from the ITEs / Polys. Even if you stay one for 10 or 20 years, your salary will probably peak around 3k

Web Development: You mean coding? Then you need to ask yourself whether you really like programming. It is one of the jobs which doesn't need you to work with people, but it isn't for everyone and it isn't uncommon for many to drop out halfway through their studies

Web Design: These skills are easy to pick up on your own on Udemy, Coursera etc.

I really think you should narrow down which area you want to invest you time and money in first. Good that you are trying out the Udemy course, which employers will not look at, but it should help you in deciding your area of focus.


2) Will private diploma / Professional 'O' Level cert get you far?

Looking at the number of graduates with 'real' diplomas from the Polytechnics and ITEs, who are now also wondering if they can compete with the equally jobless fresh local university graduates, do you think the private diploma will help you land a job?

However, if the school running the private diploma /cert is reputable and you really believe it will help you build up useful skills, then it is worth considering.
04-07-2020 11:09 AM
shinystarx Is a private diploma worth getting?
Will o level with professional certificate get me far?
I am hoping to be able to get at least 4k-5k at the peak of my career if possible
02-07-2020 02:20 PM
Unregistered Just go geylang to open your legs. It’s so simple and good $$. It’s one to one which your social anxiety need not worry. It’s not big group. 😍
02-07-2020 01:25 PM
Unregistered
Sincere advice

Hi, shinystarx.

It has been commendable of you to have asked for advice and have tried to work. You need to continue to try and stay determined.

Nowadays, IT-related work is greatly demanded and, in your case, might not need much interaction with other people. You would want to continue to self-study online and(or) enrol yourself in courses which are subsidied - such as those that can be paid for with your SkillsFuture credits (if yours have been given to you).

Although work such as that in the IT industry might be suitable for you, if you want to give yourself many more opportunities, you should try to slowly increase your confidence and comfort level in relation to interaction with people. You should start by taking small steps to talk to people and befriend them. You can, as an example, ask them about the last meal that they have eaten, discuss with them diet-related likes and dislikes, great places where one might eat and so on. Many people crave socialisation and interaction so, if you just signal your sincere wish to befriend them, they might very well respond positively. Do not be disheartened if you stumble or take wrong steps. Do not also fear failure. Everyone makes and should learn from mistakes. Again, try to take initial small steps to talk to people. If you do this, you just might finally figure out your best way of doing this, become comfortable with this and, be able to work well with people.

You are warmly welcomed to update members here about your future situation and, I trust that members who sincerely wish to help you will do this. You can overcome your "social anxiety" but, to do this, you need to try to slowly and in small steps reach out by talking to people.
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