How much are you earning per annum?

Originally Posted by if_i_may_say_so

I find it highly offensive that misogynists are making assumptions and hurling groundless accusations.

Let me make myself clear - I find it disconcerting that despite being smarter than my partner, he is earning more than me or my peers who have prestigious scholarships and numerous academic accolades. That is my main gripe.

In no way did I mention that he is of a low IQ. Both of us hail from the same secondary school (ranked within the top 10) and are from the top 3 junior colleges. While he trails me in academics, he holds his own right with a whisker away from having 1st class honours. Both are academic elites to the average man.

Additionally, it is terribly misogynistic to assume that I married him for his money.

He was born into poverty. When we got married, he had just started work and there was very little that his family could have provided us. He had a relatively high starting salary that was the envy of his peers. As mentioned, most of my peers are scholars and/or are from wealthy families. His friends and relatives clearly thought that I was "marrying down". My family paid for almost every expense of our wedding which was held in one of the top hotels. Our photography alone was a 5-figure sum, paid for by myself, after slaving hours in order not to depend fully on my family.

I married him because he was a good man. It is as simple as that.

Furthermore, I had rejected his proposal for 4 consecutive years as I felt that I was too young to get married in my early 20s.

I am very proud of my independence. Friends query why I continue to work when I can "shake legs" and enjoy life as a tai-tai. Let it be known that this is not my personality makeup. I have been indoctrinated with firm values of wielding pride and independence. One should not depend on someone else to feed you while your existence is validated by being a mere sloth who simply rots and wastes away by lazing about.

A little insight to my family background would tell you that my mother grew up with 4 servants in the household. The family once had a string of houses (more than 10). That is the kind of background that I have grown up in but my family is not materialistic and sees money as being transient. My uncle gave a large part of his wealth away during his lifetime and thousands of people have benefitted from his philanthropy.

With this in hindsight, I am understandably peeved to be taken for a gold-digger or a materialistic woman.

While I have also mentioned that I earn less than my husband, I did not state that I am earning a meagre salary. My salary is above the median. My comparison is relative, but others have chosen to make inferences when there is none.

I had expected sound reasoning and logical deductions, which some of you have done so, and I deeply appreciate your input.

As for those who have been misguided by your own depraved assumptions of women being incapable of earning or marrying a rich man despite him having a lower IQ, I am glad that you are not within my social circle. Before more assumptions can be made about my character of having peers who are scholars and rich friends, let me put it this way to you. It is easy to bond with others of the same interests and level of intellect. Quite often, such people are from relatively good backgrounds, which hurtles them up the social ladder with connections and such. I am not one who gives a hoot about your background upon meeting you. But because of a similarity in mannerisms, upbringing and shared lingo amongst a certain breed, this has led to a cumulation of friends within this demographic over the years. Take for instance a close friend whom I had known for a decade; he recently divulged that his father is actually the CEO of a billion-dollar organization.

I do not talk shop nor take an interest in the material things which my friends own. We are not interested in talking about the financial market, statistics, property nor cars. Conversations revolve around their personal lives and shared tales. This is the basis of all my friendships and relationships. Whoever they are, what they have or who they are connected to will only be revealed after several years. These friends are humble and do not see a need for ostentatious displays. If you are truly wealthy, you will not need to find every opportunity to boast nor parade what you have, for few will be able to match up in the first place.

Naturally, I am very proud that my husband has managed to throw off the shackles of his humble background and silence the naysayers on his own. However, as mentioned, I find it hard to swallow that being smarter of the two, I am not within the same salary bracket. That is my MAIN gripe.

Despite this, I do not take a single cent from my partner nor family. I firmly advocate buying what you want with the money that you have earned. There is no pride in using other people's money.

As for the vicious remark about the old folks' home, I apologize for refuting your callous statement. If there was an ounce of filial piety within you, it would not be a point of reference, even as a joke. My family is firmly against placing any member in the old folks' home. My grandmother struggled with dementia, was incontinent and prone to random verbal outbursts. For more than a decade, my mother and aunt took it upon themselves to care for her personally. That very aunt has been bedridden shortly after the demise of my grandmother. My mother cares for her now with the help of a domestic helper. Though it is taxing to accompany her for her weekly hospital appointments, hooking her up to machinery at home and having to tend to her every need, it is strongly advocated within my family that we ought to take care of one another. This tradition of caring personally for the family will be my baton. It is one which I will inherit and run the race willingly because of the strong beacons before me that I have witnessed for the past 2 decades.

I apologize for rambling and digressing. I was hoping for a good jostle of the mind with vigorous discussions, but quite unfortunately some are more adept at sweeping statements and bearing malicious thoughts. To those who have managed to voice my thoughts succinctly, thank you for the effort.

Finally, please note that not all ladies are out to bag a rich man nor care to. There are ladies who are intelligent and absolutely independent who can marry a man simply because he is good to her.

He was the poorest of all the male friends. I married him. Our condominium in a prime district did not happen overnight based on our own efforts. I was determined to be without my family's intervention. The Audi coupe and preceding BMW were fruits of my husband's labour. When we were first married, we lived in a flat with a humble Japanese car. In the beginning, I was called foolish by some and a rare gem by others to marry the poorest man within my social circle who was born into poverty. But you cannot deem me as a gold-digger. There was none to begin with! Oh, the sheer indignance I had when my eyes first scanned the scathing replies!

yor englis guddy gud. vary hie standad. i open dikshonary to noe meening. thanqu

age 45
Financial Software Salesman (clients are financial institutions)
Base Salary $330k per year before bonuses and commissions
Sales Quota US$3.5m per year
Comissions 4% of Sales
Bonuses (at the mercy of the bosses and how greedy they are)

Wah woman, you so free to write long reply?

You got no baby to take care?

Hubby busy working, no time for you?

Come here to drown your loneliness?

Go to old folks home to cheer the old folks better than whining petty nonsense

Originally Posted by Unregistered

Wah woman, you so free to write long reply?

You got no baby to take care?

Hubby busy working, no time for you?

Come here to drown your loneliness?

Go to old folks home to cheer the old folks better than whining petty nonsense

You are a troll.

We shall not feed you,

This is because we

Want you to starve to death.

Dear if_i_may_say_so,

you are well connected, highly educated, very intelligent and very articulate, but earn half as much as your husband.

How big a gap are we talking about here? 100k vs 200k?

Or 200k vs 400k? Or is it 500k vs 1m?

[bladez87]

Originally Posted by unregistered

2 yrs as a software tech. Support, earning $200k, only 25 this year. Easy job, 9 to 5, no ot. Most of the time just tell user to rtfm, it's not in the product..

csb.......

[bladez87]

Originally Posted by Unregistered

I think he's overpaid too.

I'm 28 year old and have 3 years of experience as a software technical support engineer. I'm only earning $160K. I guess it's time to look for another job. Seems like plenty of better paying jobs out there.

Are you serious that software technical support engineer can get paid 160k pa?
Why people said IT no future and low pay I have no idea

Originally Posted by if_i_may_say_so

Naturally, I am very proud that my husband has managed to throw off the shackles of his humble background and silence the naysayers on his own. However, as mentioned, I find it hard to swallow that being smarter of the two, I am not within the same salary bracket. That is my MAIN gripe.

How do you define someone being a smarter one in the first place? What makes you think you are smarter than your husband?

Even if you are really smarter, intelligence doesn't necessary equals to capability of earning money.

Dear if_i_may_say_so

I am incredulous that someone like you who claims to be smart can forcefully equate academic success to salary. The real world is never this simplistic. Perhaps you have been led astray by parents who tell of resounding pay packages in the millions if you do well in school?

I am sorry that it took you this long to understand this fact, but at least it isn't too late.

Originally Posted by Unregistered

I think he's overpaid too.

I'm 28 year old and have 3 years of experience as a software technical support engineer. I'm only earning $160K. I guess it's time to look for another job. Seems like plenty of better paying jobs out there.

Thanks for the information.