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  #7831 (permalink)  
Old 21-07-2020, 05:17 PM
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male lawyers are more likely to cheat la.

so many out there who love preying on interns and junior assocs.
Not true at all.
Not everyone is an alpha male with a primal instinct to cheat.
Some are just very childish and immature. Breakup by a law girl hurts them more deeply than anything. Apart from their tantrums, they are pretty much harmless and loyal.
I dated one and the guy is now my husband. Gosh, the first two years of the r/s was hell but glad I pulled through. The guy is extremely loyal and a keeper.
Won’t say that in the first 2 years.
Other friends dated a suave, extremely mature guy, but ended up broken when they were in their 30s when the guy cheated on them. So really the above statement is not true at all.
Guys take much longer to mature up.

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  #7832 (permalink)  
Old 21-07-2020, 05:37 PM
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male lawyers are more likely to cheat la.

so many out there who love preying on interns and junior assocs.
Long gone are the days where male lawyers prey on their juniors. Look at the news today where the former Philippino ambassador is charged with molesting a woman in her early 30s by hugging her from her back without her consent. Just recently, it was also on the news where the SK minister committed suicide because someone ratted out on him that he molested a girl.

Males these days are more cautious and SHOULD be cautious. There is too much to lose for a guy.

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  #7833 (permalink)  
Old 21-07-2020, 05:38 PM
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Long gone are the days where male lawyers prey on their juniors. Look at the news today where the former Philippino ambassador is charged with molesting a woman in her early 30s by hugging her from her back without her consent. Just recently, it was also on the news where the SK minister committed suicide because someone ratted out on him that he molested a girl.

Males these days are more cautious and SHOULD be cautious. There is too much to lose for a guy.
Exactly. We are not even talking about the old era. We are talking present.

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  #7834 (permalink)  
Old 21-07-2020, 05:43 PM
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Exactly. We are not even talking about the old era. We are talking present.
That guy who committed suicide was a human rights lawyer i think quite sad la.
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  #7835 (permalink)  
Old 21-07-2020, 05:47 PM
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It's not fair. Girls can get TCs and retention through sex.
I'm a girl just graduated desperately looking for a TC and willing to do anything for it. How do I go about it?
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  #7836 (permalink)  
Old 21-07-2020, 06:01 PM
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Thank you so much, I appreciate this advice. Yes, I’ve been asked to tender in August and leave immediately, despite my notice period being 3 months. I am trying to avoid appearing difficult given how small the industry is, and how fast words spread. But I would really need the full notice period to look for a job. I am absolutely shocked and disappointed at the firm’s decision to do this to its associates during this challenging time.
Sorry to hear that you've been placed in this difficult scenario. I know someone who was in your exact shoes and is now doing fine, although it was during a less turbulent time. (I have myself been in an only slightly more favourable scenario - and doing better now than if I hadn't been too).

For those who've never been in such a position, I'm sure OP is aware that he is entitled to 3 months' notice contractually but he/she is probably being threatened with facing a choice between tendering of his own volition with only one month's notice / immediate notice (but he can tell future potential employers that decision to leave was his), or three months' notice (but potential future employers will be told that he was asked to resign / terminated).

May I suggest this as a potential idea - tender now immediately of your own volition as is your right under the contract with 3 months' notice - in future if they or anyone tries to say that you were asked to resign, say that they only came up with that post facto and used that to threaten you to accept only one month's notice. Not really sure if this idea works though.

I also definitely agree with one of the suggestions above that trying to negotiate (6 weeks maybe?) is always worth considering. Definitely would not recommend litigation obviously to avoid appearing difficult (mediation/TADM..... maybe but I wouldn't recommend - too formal). I don't think there is a clear answer in how hard you should push in your negotiations, but I think you should take into account the silver lining about this event happening during this COVID - which is that the presumption people may have when they hear about this may be that your current shitty firm/bosses are doing this not because your performance is bad but because they are doing badly in this current economy. This is particularly true if your firm is e.g. a firm with a swanky set of law offices overlooking the Marina Bay with a high rental in the lease that has been rumoured to have had recent salary cuts.

Keep your chin up and put your full efforts into finding a new place that will better appreciate you, in a few years you will likely see this was a blessing in disguise. Apologies for the wall of text above.
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  #7837 (permalink)  
Old 21-07-2020, 06:18 PM
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Any thoughts on this?

s://instagram.com/stories/toxicstatenarrativeinsg/2357905382126787935?igshid=sy6ct3dt83u9


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  #7838 (permalink)  
Old 21-07-2020, 06:21 PM
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Oh but true about the reference check. You'd probably want to negotiate in a calm and reasonable way, without agitating your employer. You may have to accept something less - e.g. a shorter notice period, in order for a little more comfort that your ex-employer might be less inclined to give you an unfavourable reference.

Also, not everyone checks references from the candidate's previous firm, so there's some further uncertainty to this option.
Agree there is definitely some risk involved due to the reference check angle... But your current employer isn't completely free to slander you at will though... they have a duty of care not to give a negligent reference. See the Ramesh Krishnan v AXA case. There is also a limit to how often a firm can say that their ex-employees are **** without looking like **** themselves.

Another strategy could be to pre-emptively raise this when you are interviewing with your new potential employers. This will give you a chance to frame the narrative and your side of the story. But it is definitely a delicate exercise that needs to be handled with care though.
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  #7839 (permalink)  
Old 21-07-2020, 06:26 PM
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Any thoughts on this?

s://instagram.com/stories/toxicstatenarrativeinsg/2357905382126787935?igshid=sy6ct3dt83u9
Can’t see bro, what’s this about
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  #7840 (permalink)  
Old 21-07-2020, 06:29 PM
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Can’t see bro, what’s this about
About how CY is saying today that some lawyer has been accused of sexual harassments from not just one but many other girls. Too many of such cases out there. That's why bros, stay cautious and be on the safe side.
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