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  #2791 (permalink)  
Old 06-05-2018, 09:42 AM
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Hi there, I know many single ladies in their mid to late 30s that have the same problem as you. There is one colleague who is particularly capable and good looking, but she has serious character flaws in that she cannot lose an argument.

I think this trait is inherent in good lawyers and commercial/contract people and that is unfortunate.

Sorry to be blunt but I think your best bet would be a divorcee angmo who could take the sh*t.
Yeah tbh I dated woman like you before and was dumped. Iím a high flying civil servant.
So I told myself single female lawyers above 30 - caveat emptor

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  #2792 (permalink)  
Old 06-05-2018, 09:59 AM
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Hi there, I know many single ladies in their mid to late 30s that have the same problem as you. There is one colleague who is particularly capable and good looking, but she has serious character flaws in that she cannot lose an argument.

I think this trait is inherent in good lawyers and commercial/contract people and that is unfortunate.

Sorry to be blunt but I think your best bet would be a divorcee angmo who could take the sh*t.
Yes you are spot on.

While I do not want to stereotype, time and time again shows the same pattern in these women who are above 30 and single.

They somehow lack the compassion and patience when dealing with others especially peers and subordinates. Yes they are very confident, have a mind of their own, great achievements. I do not however think this is what men are looking for in a spouse.

I am a married man with kids. I cannot imagine a parent who lack the patience to deal with others who are simply different.

Seriously, If I need to look for a spouse to have children and set up a family , would I choose someone in 20s or 30s?

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  #2793 (permalink)  
Old 06-05-2018, 12:19 PM
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Yeah tbh I dated woman like you before and was dumped. Iím a high flying civil servant.
So I told myself single female lawyers above 30 - caveat emptor
Yes and i am the prime minister

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  #2794 (permalink)  
Old 06-05-2018, 03:18 PM
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I am not a troll.

But I wonder if anyone is same as me.
I am in Early mid 30s. Female.

But I donít seem to be able to find love and a man to settle down with.
Since graduation I have been in this profession.
I met many great male colleagues unfortunately most good men are attached married.

My question is is it too late for me to find love and to settle down?

I believe I am attractive. Smart. Law degree holder. Lawyer by profession. Can craft arguments well. Well read.

And why are all the good men taken?

It seems I have no luck in love. What can I do?
Become a lesbian managing partner and join AWARE (just to to dot the is and cross the ts) in order to fulfil the prophecy of being a man-hating spinster who has been left on the shelf.

As previously suggested, next best option are fat balding angmos if devoid of local chances.
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  #2795 (permalink)  
Old 06-05-2018, 03:29 PM
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Become a lesbian managing partner and join AWARE (just to to dot the is and cross the ts) in order to fulfil the prophecy of being a man-hating spinster who has been left on the shelf.

As previously suggested, next best option are fat balding angmos if devoid of local chances.
Recall the rather delectable pairing of Bernice wong and Anton Casey. Advantage with a having a double barrelled last name is that he doesn't even need to be high ses if you earn enough to support him.
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  #2796 (permalink)  
Old 06-05-2018, 08:37 PM
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Whatís with you people belittling women singles above 30s?

mind you I do not need a man. I am strong and independent and I earn my own money.

I am also intelligent and very strong communicator.


Itís just a matter of the fact the men I met arenít good enough for me to date.

Perhaps some day somebody will appreciate me for who I am.
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  #2797 (permalink)  
Old 06-05-2018, 09:01 PM
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Whatís with you people belittling women singles above 30s?

mind you I do not need a man. I am strong and independent and I earn my own money.

I am also intelligent and very strong communicator.


Itís just a matter of the fact the men I met arenít good enough for me to date.

Perhaps some day somebody will appreciate me for who I am.
Okay then wish you well in finding Mr Right.
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  #2798 (permalink)  
Old 07-05-2018, 12:19 AM
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Samuel Ling

ASKING QUESTIONS AS KWAY TEOW
to all potential kway teows out there: i know we seniors can be intimidating on fb. i apologise if my tone was harsh on my fb post. perhaps i should clarify. i am annoyed only with those that are hiding behind anonymity because they are competitive and are doing it for bell curve reasons, which i know is a thing. if that is not you, then i am not disappointed in you.

personally i have no quarrel with people who are posting as kway teow because they are shy. this is, after all, a mini overheard, and people are judgy. it is this judgmental culture that i am instead upset about.

so don't be shy, just use your real name to ask questions. if you get judged for asking about mods, the problem does not lie with you. and yes, if you are still terrified, just go ahead and post as kway teow. as long as you are careful, it's impossible to figure out who you are.

ASKING FOR MUGGERS AS KWAY TEOW
as for asking for muggers, in an ideal world, all info will be freely shared. but since this is not an ideal world, make friends and learn to network, just like the real world outside law school. spend some effort finding out who has taken the module before (scroll down this thread and see who has responded, if nobody has, ask your friends. if you don't have any, you may find this is not the right profession for you) and ask them directly.

while it may not have been the intention, an anonymous open jio ("hey who has the latest xxx muggers") just comes off as lazy and entitled: you get to enjoy anonymity, whereas any generous senior will have to take the initiative to stand up and help you, while himself/herself potentially getting inundated with mugger requests. i think people are in general more accepting of people who ask as themselves. i will usually contact them by PM if i know where to get those muggers (mainly cos i don't want to get inundated with requests).

most importantly, when you ask, do so *humbly* and *sincerely*. most people i know are willing to share if you are on friendly terms, and ask nicely (again, this is where some social skills play a role. someone who makes an effort to be friendly will have more success here).

this muggers thing is really sensitive and is a bit of a black art, and as i said in an ideal world this won't be the case, but because this isn't an ideal world, learn the unwritten rules, make friends and be resourceful. these same skills will serve you well in practice.
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  #2799 (permalink)  
Old 07-05-2018, 08:19 AM
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Hi all,

I've been following this thread for a while and have observed quite a lot of good information here, though there is the occasional divergence from the topic. I'm looking for some advice and perspectives from seniors/lawyers who've been or in or have friends in similar situations.

If you had a choice to do a TC at an international firm in singapore (think a&o/cc/bakers) or at a US firm(s) in London (with no/limited presence in singapore but not necessarily hk/asia- think kirkland/debevoise/skadden), where would you prefer to do your TC at and why?

I'm especially interested to know:

- what advantages I would gain from starting at CC singapore (that would make up for the opportunity cost of working in london/a US firm) = I'm aware that CC and A&O sends their trainees for 6-month secondments to London and there is the prospect of dual-qualification

- how the private equity market is like in singapore? if anyone can expand on whether PE experience in a firm in london would be valued in singapore, this would be helpful! (interested in this especially because i heard that the PE market in singapore is quite dry?)

thanks for your help guys! any insight would really be appreciated
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  #2800 (permalink)  
Old 08-05-2018, 12:25 AM
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Originally Posted by unregistered View Post
Hi all,

I've been following this thread for a while and have observed quite a lot of good information here, though there is the occasional divergence from the topic. I'm looking for some advice and perspectives from seniors/lawyers who've been or in or have friends in similar situations.

If you had a choice to do a TC at an international firm in singapore (think a&o/cc/bakers) or at a US firm(s) in London (with no/limited presence in singapore but not necessarily hk/asia- think kirkland/debevoise/skadden), where would you prefer to do your TC at and why?

I'm especially interested to know:

- what advantages I would gain from starting at CC singapore (that would make up for the opportunity cost of working in london/a US firm) = I'm aware that CC and A&O sends their trainees for 6-month secondments to London and there is the prospect of dual-qualification

- how the private equity market is like in singapore? if anyone can expand on whether PE experience in a firm in london would be valued in singapore, this would be helpful! (interested in this especially because i heard that the PE market in singapore is quite dry?)

thanks for your help guys! any insight would really be appreciated

First off I think US firms don't give out TCs in Singapore because there's no training requirement for US jurisdictions, e.g. you just sit for the NY bar exams. You get hired straight as an associate out of law school.

The question then is why would they hire an LLB grad when the min requirement for most of their people is a JD?

Most people who are Commonwealth qualified lawyers have at least 4 + years of experience at Big 4 or MC before they lateral to US firms.

This may be different in London where they do have qualifying training programmes? Correct me if I'm unaware.

As regards prestige, think of MC firms as Officer Cadet School (OCS), Big 4 firms as Specialist Cadet School (SCS) and US firms as commissioned officers LTA and above.

MC firms are known as good training grounds, good culture generally and solid prestige / repudiation. I believe that is also the reputation they have in their homebase London.

OTOH, US firms are known for long hours but good pay and prestige beats MC hands own, even in London. Salaries approach investment banking levels. You basically get "beasted" and its sink or swim but your exit options are excellent.

If you can secure a training programme for a US firm in the City I would think the answer is a no brainer. There are already 2 advantages: (1) London > Singapore, (2) US firm (generally) > MC firm...Unless you're homesick.

If you can get qualified in UK, there's no problem coming in as a foreign practitioner in Singapore.
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