How much $ do you give your parents every month?

Originally Posted by Unregistered

My hubby gives around SGD750 a mth to both parents whom are in Malaysia (Which translates to abt RM1800.00). They are still not satisfied and keep asking for more! I'm very fed up with their attitude.

I'm a stayhome mom, 2 school going kids. We still have to pay for our HDB, kids tuitions and enrichments and our own livelihood. Why are they so ungrateful? My FIL likes to gamble, thus treats us like ATM, ask us to send $$ when ever he needs. We had just settled a huge medical bil for him (he almost died) but he continues his gambling habits.

I really don't know what to do. I feel like elling them off but I don't want my hubby to be sanwiched btwn his wife and parents!

They have a younger son whom also contributes to them but not very regular.

What do you think I should do? Or am I over reacting? I'm worried for my kids education.. plus this has given a lot of stress to my hubby. He works 2 jobs to try to make more so that he can give them more! I'm afraid his health will be compromised. Why are they so inconsiderate?

Follow post 27, 'think of yourself first'.

Worse to worse, divorce your husband if he still feed his leech gambling father. Get alimony from him after divorce and at same time the legal seperation will absolve you from any debts which might be incurred in future.

Can never play too safe with gamblers and stupid offspring who support their leeching parents.

Originally Posted by Unregistered

Follow post 27, 'think of yourself first'.

Worse to worse, divorce your husband if he still feed his leech gambling father. Get alimony from him after divorce and at same time the legal seperation will absolve you from any debts which might be incurred in future.

Can never play too safe with gamblers and stupid offspring who support their leeching parents.

Following her last para, clearly her hubby is retarded, why stick with such a loser ?

Give a grand to my parents every month.. dat's approximately 10% of salary.
However recently during CNY, my aunt criticized my dad that I'm unfilial. According to her, I'm earning reasonably well but I have never gave a cent to my grandma. This should be the responsibilities of my grandma's children isn't it? Anyway, none of my cousins are giving her regular allowance. Eventhough she's my elder, she has never been directly involved in bringing me up, except bringing my dad to this world. Am I in the wrong for not giving?

[Bean]

Originally Posted by Money is never enough

Give a grand to my parents every month.. dat's approximately 10% of salary.
However recently during CNY, my aunt criticized my dad that I'm unfilial. According to her, I'm earning reasonably well but I have never gave a cent to my grandma. This should be the responsibilities of my grandma's children isn't it? Anyway, none of my cousins are giving her regular allowance. Eventhough she's my elder, she has never been directly involved in bringing me up, except bringing my dad to this world. Am I in the wrong for not giving?

WOW, you earn $10000/mth and you give only $1000 to parent? A little neow lei. At least should give 1.8k-2k ma.

regarding giving $$ to grandma, I think it is your parent responsibility to give $$$ to grandma or the grandma's children, not you (grand children..). I also never give $$ to grandma. When I visit her, occasionally will buy grandma her favorite food like sushi/curry puff/during cakes...etc, that's all.

I earn 3.7k(b4 CPF), give 800-1000/mth to parents....already....

Originally Posted by Bean

WOW, you earn $10000/mth and you give only $1000 to parent? A little neow lei. At least should give 1.8k-2k ma.

regarding giving $$ to grandma, I think it is your parent responsibility to give $$$ to grandma or the grandma's children, not you (grand children..). I also never give $$ to grandma. When I visit her, occasionally will buy grandma her favorite food like sushi/curry puff/during cakes...etc, that's all.

I earn 3.7k(b4 CPF), give 800-1000/mth to parents....already....

I dun deny the amount given to my parents are not significant but bo bian. I'm in the sandwich class. Together with my wife-to-be, our basic is over $16K/m. We can't buy EC, DBSS or any new HDB. I'm considering to get a 2nd hand HDB so that i can have more cash on hand but she's looking at private condo.. If we are really getting a private condo, then HH income of $16K is hardly just enough.

[Watson]

I give 400 which is less than 10% of my salary now . I started with 300 when I was earning 2.5k
Now though I earn more I don't give much more.
I do give extra for my parents holidays.
My mum holidays very frequently, avg twice in 3mths. Typically to Asia, budget trips.
They r not too old, can still wrk but my mum is rather lazy, retired at early 50s
They r constantly expecting me to pay, give them more.
I hv a younger bro, but parents mollycoddle him and don't hv the same high expectations fr him.
This is why I give lesser, my parents do not know how much I earn and I intend to keep it that way. They are always commenting to rely me at their old age. Aka move in with my family. My partner objects, me too. I feel my bro is a bummer for earning so little, unable to look after the family.

[Watson]

To add,
400 to my family
1k to my pil who looks after my children
Combi income 14k

[Bean]

Originally Posted by Money is never enough

I dun deny the amount given to my parents are not significant but bo bian. I'm in the sandwich class. Together with my wife-to-be, our basic is over $16K/m. We can't buy EC, DBSS or any new HDB. I'm considering to get a 2nd hand HDB so that i can have more cash on hand but she's looking at private condo.. If we are really getting a private condo, then HH income of $16K is hardly just enough.

the final decision lies with your wife.......I rather get 2nd hand HDB(5rm) + COV = 600k with your kind of joint 16k/mth...is much much cheaper than today at least 1million condo

My fiance and I earn a combined income of $13k+. It is largely my income. Her parents though much less well-off than mine are both retirees. They are very nice people and easy going.

Our arrangement is that my wife-to-be gives an allowance to her parents every month whilst I am in-charge of contributing to my family.

I give $2000 per month to my parents whilst my fiance gives only $200 (about 10% of her salary). We deliberately hide my income from my them as we fear it may create unhappiness.

Do you guys think this is a fair arrangement? Should I be giving a portion of my salary to upkeep them as well?

My parents don't need my contribution at all to be honest. They have passive income of about $15k per month from rental and stocks and are still both working. My contribution to them is more of a gesture and also to prevent my relatives from gossiping.

In return for my monthly contribution, my parents have given us a house + car. Plus, my father insists on paying for all family holidays. His theory is that all his children are equal and if he pays for one, he will pay for all. I have 3 siblings.

However, when I discussed with my mum about increasing my contribution to my parents-in-law, this struck a raw nerve. My parents got quite upset with that suggestion.

It seems that when we do get married (this year), things are going to get even more messy. Really don't know how to solve this issue

[alwaysnforever]

Originally Posted by Unregistered

My fiance and I earn a combined income of $13k+. It is largely my income. Her parents though much less well-off than mine are both retirees. They are very nice people and easy going.

Our arrangement is that my wife-to-be gives an allowance to her parents every month whilst I am in-charge of contributing to my family.

I give $2000 per month to my parents whilst my fiance gives only $200 (about 10% of her salary). We deliberately hide my income from my them as we fear it may create unhappiness.

Do you guys think this is a fair arrangement? Should I be giving a portion of my salary to upkeep them as well?

My parents don't need my contribution at all to be honest. They have passive income of about $15k per month from rental and stocks and are still both working. My contribution to them is more of a gesture and also to prevent my relatives from gossiping.

In return for my monthly contribution, my parents have given us a house + car. Plus, my father insists on paying for all family holidays. His theory is that all his children are equal and if he pays for one, he will pay for all. I have 3 siblings.

However, when I discussed with my mum about increasing my contribution to my parents-in-law, this struck a raw nerve. My parents got quite upset with that suggestion.

It seems that when we do get married (this year), things are going to get even more messy. Really don't know how to solve this issue

You could always give your in laws allowance and tell your parents otherwise. Save any unnecessary trouble