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-   -   I'm such a failure. Anyone can help me? (https://forums.salary.sg/income-jobs/1383-im-such-failure-anyone-can-help-me.html)

Unregistered 18-07-2011 03:06 AM

I can only offer my own experience.

I was 25 when I graduated from NUS Arts and Soc Sciences. I then spent the two years doing absolutely nothing. This might be hard to believe but time flies when you're playing video games, clubbing, watching live sports and running the odd errand for my increasingly sad parents.

But i was increasingly discouraged as I saw my peers beginning to establish their careers as doctors, lawyers, etc. (Disclaimer: I spent 4 good teenage years studying in Bishan) And it was becoming increasingly hard to explain to potential employers about the gap since graduation. This became increasingly depressing.

At 27, I was totally lost and even entertained suicidal thoughts. But i discovered a Masters degree course that piqued my interest. I was very very lucky to secure a scholarship from the host country as well. So I left Sg to go overseas in 4 years ago.

Some months before departure, I met my then girlfriend. I told her that we should both give this long-distance relationship game a try and she agreed. I guess i was again very lucky as this long distance online relationship worked out - she is now my fiance.

I told myself that I'll be a new person in the UK , and that I'll start working harder than I ever did before (which was not hard!). One thing led to another, and I'm now working in a challenging and satisfying profession.

Late last year, the UK changed its visa regulations (unlike Sg) to make it harder for immigrants to stay. I was a bit sad, as everything changed within a day and I've to return to Sg. Thankfully, the small company i worked for quickly promoted me to ensure that my salary met the new requirements.

Life is inevitably full of challenges, but don't let your past define you. Anything is possible if you don't give up and resolve to turn your life around. Hard work is free!

Unregistered 18-07-2011 09:09 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Unregistered (Post 14350)
I can only offer my own experience.

I was 25 when I graduated from NUS Arts and Soc Sciences. I then spent the two years doing absolutely nothing. This might be hard to believe but time flies when you're playing video games, clubbing, watching live sports and running the odd errand for my increasingly sad parents.

But i was increasingly discouraged as I saw my peers beginning to establish their careers as doctors, lawyers, etc. (Disclaimer: I spent 4 good teenage years studying in Bishan) And it was becoming increasingly hard to explain to potential employers about the gap since graduation. This became increasingly depressing.

At 27, I was totally lost and even entertained suicidal thoughts. But i discovered a Masters degree course that piqued my interest. I was very very lucky to secure a scholarship from the host country as well. So I left Sg to go overseas in 4 years ago.

Some months before departure, I met my then girlfriend. I told her that we should both give this long-distance relationship game a try and she agreed. I guess i was again very lucky as this long distance online relationship worked out - she is now my fiance.

I told myself that I'll be a new person in the UK , and that I'll start working harder than I ever did before (which was not hard!). One thing led to another, and I'm now working in a challenging and satisfying profession.

Late last year, the UK changed its visa regulations (unlike Sg) to make it harder for immigrants to stay. I was a bit sad, as everything changed within a day and I've to return to Sg. Thankfully, the small company i worked for quickly promoted me to ensure that my salary met the new requirements.

Life is inevitably full of challenges, but don't let your past define you. Anything is possible if you don't give up and resolve to turn your life around. Hard work is free!

Congratulations on making it!

I like the part on "unlike Sg".

Ultimatehopper 20-07-2011 10:17 PM

Sad life
 
Sorry for hijacking ur thread as ur title do suits me as well.

I tendered my job a month back which in total 3 months period in the co. The job do early lot of money but decided to leave because i have alot of setback in my mind probably too choosy in everything. I love to do things with passion 1st, money 2nd.

Currently im still jobless... unemployed for 1 month already. trying my best to hook on a job i like but im still choosy because i dont want to hop again. I went to numbers of interviews but i rejected it by (half fark interview,hold on the offer and comparing with others,listen out about the job field etc...)

Worst of all, i dont have good qualification, i dont have good communication skill.... worst like pile of ****.

Was wondering what i should do right now...

Unregistered 21-07-2011 05:16 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Unregistered (Post 13600)
hi, don't choose your life to revolve around girls or unrealistic expectations.

my advice is to stay focused on one thing. now, it's time to focus on your career.

not everyday can pass M9 at one go. It just means you will need to work harder. At the end, you will be better more familiar with M9 than others who passed by luck on first time.

find wad you really want and like to do in life. If you're in IT, concentrate on your IT skills n knowledge. If you wan to move to finance industry, be prepared to work doubly hard because you're going to learn plenty of new things.

When you can achieve these, success (girls and money) will come your way.

Chinese gals are only good when they give you massage and in KTV...u pay them and they give you best service...otherwise....dun even go near...they are mostly traps..haha
I enjoy chinese gals.....I pay....they service...haha

Joe123 22-07-2011 10:57 AM

i came from a family of 11. my parents have to raise all kids, they were neither rich or born with a sliver spoon. there is only the family there, happily eating and bonding each day after work, and at dawn. Your family loves you, dont make them worry.

with regards to your career, relationship, is it something you want to do? something that you have the desire or passion to fullfil? dont be a bun, wake up and ask yourself what you want to focus on and complete. set goals and stick to it.

Unregistered 22-07-2011 02:20 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by JL84 (Post 13593)
I'm 27 and I graduated from NYP with a diploma in Electronics, Computers and Communications Engineering.

After my NS, I studied a BsC Degree in Economics and Finance for 4 years (But I kept failing and still have 1 more year to go)

I was in an online relationship for 2 years and spent almost everynight with this Chinese girl. My grades deterioated as I thought she is the girl of my life.

We are supposed to meet this month which is my birthday after 2.5years of chatting online. My dreams and hopes are dashed when I discovered she have been two-timing me and cohabiting with a guy for some time.

All my efforts of getting her back are futile. I hated myself not going to meet her earlier and also found it a blessing in disguise because that showed what kind of character she is.

One of a friend introduced me to be a Fiancial Advisor in a certain life assurance company. I passed M5, but failed M9. This terribly gave me a morale drop in life. I was at a point on the verge of suicide if not for the utmost support and concern of my friends and family.

My CV only stated one job which I worked probably 1+year ago as a IT guy in a company for several months short stint.

I think I'm lost in life. Others 27 year old are earning big bucks, driving big car but I'm just a nobody, a failure.

I'm not asking for directions, I am just not definite. I don't know if being FA is really what I want. I don't see myself servicing others for the many years down the road. Like everyone, I want a lot of money during the shortest period of time to repay my father who has been shouldering me with the education assistance these years. I'm such a letdown.

Anyone can help? I know I must help myself first.

Regards,
JL

You are indeed quite a loser and delusional, come on, a online gf for two years, I think you should wake up your idea and things will improve from there

Unregistered 22-07-2011 05:32 PM

You only fail when you give up. Decide what you want in life and set goals to help you work towards it. Be focus, determined and don't let anyone tell you that you can't achieve it.

Unregistered 23-07-2011 12:00 PM

Hey there, this is my opinion la.

Don't worry about friends who drive so called big cars... at that age, most have to tighten their belt (tight tight) to pay for the cars... do simple calculations, u will know.

My point of view is, It's ok to try out some career options, but by 30 be focus and work towards progression. Then again, these are just numbers. It's up to individual. I sincerely think at the age of 27, u r probably at the stage where u r learning and at a stage of 'trial and error'. As you move towards 30, be focus on your career.

I went through a rough ride in my mid 20s, I keep trying, learn from my mistakes, improve myself.. and when I look back, those rough rides made me stronger and wiser.

About girls.. relax dude, slow and steady. Just be sincere, don't try too hard and be cool. ;)

Anyway, I'm someone who don't really like to date... so well.. hahaha.. so no rush..

Appreciate life as a single person.
Appreciate life as an attached person.
Appreciate life as a married person.
Appreciate life as a married with children person.
Basically, appreciate life at every stage of your life.

Remember - Never give up. If there's a problem, there's a solution. Always think of positive solutions. :)

just to share, cheers.

Abdullah 23-07-2011 12:05 PM

set a goal and take small little concrete steps.. achieve little goals that will eventually help u achieve your main goal. as u go along, your confidence will grow.

cheers...

Unregistered 13-08-2011 03:56 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Unregistered (Post 14350)
I can only offer my own experience.

I was 25 when I graduated from NUS Arts and Soc Sciences. I then spent the two years doing absolutely nothing. This might be hard to believe but time flies when you're playing video games, clubbing, watching live sports and running the odd errand for my increasingly sad parents.

But i was increasingly discouraged as I saw my peers beginning to establish their careers as doctors, lawyers, etc. (Disclaimer: I spent 4 good teenage years studying in Bishan) And it was becoming increasingly hard to explain to potential employers about the gap since graduation. This became increasingly depressing.

At 27, I was totally lost and even entertained suicidal thoughts. But i discovered a Masters degree course that piqued my interest. I was very very lucky to secure a scholarship from the host country as well. So I left Sg to go overseas in 4 years ago.

Some months before departure, I met my then girlfriend. I told her that we should both give this long-distance relationship game a try and she agreed. I guess i was again very lucky as this long distance online relationship worked out - she is now my fiance.

I told myself that I'll be a new person in the UK , and that I'll start working harder than I ever did before (which was not hard!). One thing led to another, and I'm now working in a challenging and satisfying profession.

Late last year, the UK changed its visa regulations (unlike Sg) to make it harder for immigrants to stay. I was a bit sad, as everything changed within a day and I've to return to Sg. Thankfully, the small company i worked for quickly promoted me to ensure that my salary met the new requirements.

Life is inevitably full of challenges, but don't let your past define you. Anything is possible if you don't give up and resolve to turn your life around. Hard work is free!

Great that you didn't give up and things have work out for you. Life is so short and one should try to make the most out of each day.

I was working in UK too and getting those immigration stuffs done especially for the whole family is really hard.


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