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Need career advice : quit 9 month job

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  #11 (permalink)  
Old 09-05-2019, 07:21 AM
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Originally Posted by Unregistered View Post
Having work in civil sector before, I do not think you are able to suka suka apply for transfer.

I think your mom is right. There are such ppl like him around in every company. You can run but you can't hide. What if next job you meet such colleague again? Are you going to quit again?

Since you are consider a fresh graduate I think you are quite fortunate to get into civil sector whereas other grads might still be looking for jobs.

I think you should try to face your fears to be honest.

Just a question though, is it a Male or female colleague? Because you mention "him" and "she" in your post.
Thanks for your reply. Believe me, I am painfully aware that given my circumstances I may be better off than tons of people. People who don't have a job, shitty pay, physically demanding job etc. That's partly why I have been also feeling like an incompetent loser, because I am letting this one person get to me. Every time something happen and cock up, I always feel like it's my fault.

To the other poster, unfortunately aside from this toxic colleague, there is no one else in this role. I am unable to seek help or coaching regarding my work from anyone else. The best analogy I can think of is like if your teacher don't want to teach you properly, or purposely teach wrong thing and when you mess up/make mistake, then talk bad about you to everyone else to make you look bad. That's partly why I have been feeling so helpless and trapped

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  #12 (permalink)  
Old 16-05-2019, 04:23 PM
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Originally Posted by voskesbun View Post
Thanks for your reply. Believe me, I am painfully aware that given my circumstances I may be better off than tons of people. People who don't have a job, shitty pay, physically demanding job etc. That's partly why I have been also feeling like an incompetent loser, because I am letting this one person get to me. Every time something happen and cock up, I always feel like it's my fault.

To the other poster, unfortunately aside from this toxic colleague, there is no one else in this role. I am unable to seek help or coaching regarding my work from anyone else. The best analogy I can think of is like if your teacher don't want to teach you properly, or purposely teach wrong thing and when you mess up/make mistake, then talk bad about you to everyone else to make you look bad. That's partly why I have been feeling so helpless and trapped
My 2 cents worth.

1) Quit your job, but not before securing another job. To those who say there will always be such people regardless of where you are, the opposite is true: you may also find a job devoid of such people

2) Scrutinize yourself: what made your colleague to be so "mean" to you in the first place? It takes 2 hands to clap, there must be something that you did (whether knowingly or otherwise), that offended him/her. Else you may be just too sensitive.

3) It's not difficult to account for changing jobs after 9 months, even as a fresh grad. In fact, its easier to justify because you are a fresh grad: one example would be "I am clearer on what I want after my first job experience, therefore I am taking control to quit and join xxx to do xxx". There's always 2 sides to a coin, it depends on which side are you preaching.

Good luck, and update us.

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  #13 (permalink)  
Old 21-05-2019, 02:45 AM
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Originally Posted by voskesbun View Post
Thanks for your reply. Believe me, I am painfully aware that given my circumstances I may be better off than tons of people. People who don't have a job, shitty pay, physically demanding job etc. That's partly why I have been also feeling like an incompetent loser, because I am letting this one person get to me. Every time something happen and cock up, I always feel like it's my fault.

To the other poster, unfortunately aside from this toxic colleague, there is no one else in this role. I am unable to seek help or coaching regarding my work from anyone else. The best analogy I can think of is like if your teacher don't want to teach you properly, or purposely teach wrong thing and when you mess up/make mistake, then talk bad about you to everyone else to make you look bad. That's partly why I have been feeling so helpless and trapped
How are you now? Did you managed to solve your problem?

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  #14 (permalink)  
Old 21-05-2019, 07:03 AM
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Next time, find out about toxic colleagues and culture as soon as possible, within your probation period. That way, you can quit immediately and not put down the job as part of your work experience.

Valid reasons to put:
- toxic culture (yes be honest)
- health issues (be careful, because this may backfire)
- taking a break to care for close relative (tell a lie if you have to)
- other urgent family matter (eg lawsuit, elderly overseas relatives here for visit)
- you signed up for an entrepreneurship course (go find something and sign up)
- you started a small business with friend or relative and it didnít work out

Or just plainly lie on your CV. Pray that you donít get caught.
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  #15 (permalink)  
Old 21-05-2019, 07:08 AM
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You can learn to be better than that toxic colleague and one day give him the same treatment he gave you. And then tell him, ďServes you right.Ē

If itís just knowledge about the internal processes, it can be learned with time.

One day you will be better than him at work. And that day is the day you seek revenge. Get him fired.
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  #16 (permalink)  
Old 22-05-2019, 12:23 PM
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I agree with the last 2 pointers.

Before you quit your job, take a deeper look into yourself and ensure it is not your character flaw. I faced the same situation as you, but I took it as a challenge to make the person like me or at least improve the situation. I still have occasional anxiety attacks and dreading Sunday, but I proved to myself I am in-charge of the situation.

An advice was given to me, which I felt was very wise. Don't change job to escape from something, change job because you are genuinely interested the new job. Else, you will not be able to escape the 'dreading' feeling.

Good luck!


Quote:
Originally Posted by Unregistered View Post
My 2 cents worth.

1) Quit your job, but not before securing another job. To those who say there will always be such people regardless of where you are, the opposite is true: you may also find a job devoid of such people

2) Scrutinize yourself: what made your colleague to be so "mean" to you in the first place? It takes 2 hands to clap, there must be something that you did (whether knowingly or otherwise), that offended him/her. Else you may be just too sensitive.

3) It's not difficult to account for changing jobs after 9 months, even as a fresh grad. In fact, its easier to justify because you are a fresh grad: one example would be "I am clearer on what I want after my first job experience, therefore I am taking control to quit and join xxx to do xxx". There's always 2 sides to a coin, it depends on which side are you preaching.

Good luck, and update us.
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