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09-05-2019, 07:21 AM
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Junior Member
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Join Date: May 2019
Posts: 4
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Unregistered
Having work in civil sector before, I do not think you are able to suka suka apply for transfer.
I think your mom is right. There are such ppl like him around in every company. You can run but you can't hide. What if next job you meet such colleague again? Are you going to quit again?
Since you are consider a fresh graduate I think you are quite fortunate to get into civil sector whereas other grads might still be looking for jobs.
I think you should try to face your fears to be honest.
Just a question though, is it a Male or female colleague? Because you mention "him" and "she" in your post.
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Thanks for your reply. Believe me, I am painfully aware that given my circumstances I may be better off than tons of people. People who don't have a job, shitty pay, physically demanding job etc. That's partly why I have been also feeling like an incompetent loser, because I am letting this one person get to me. Every time something happen and cock up, I always feel like it's my fault.
To the other poster, unfortunately aside from this toxic colleague, there is no one else in this role. I am unable to seek help or coaching regarding my work from anyone else. The best analogy I can think of is like if your teacher don't want to teach you properly, or purposely teach wrong thing and when you mess up/make mistake, then talk bad about you to everyone else to make you look bad. That's partly why I have been feeling so helpless and trapped
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16-05-2019, 04:23 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by voskesbun
Thanks for your reply. Believe me, I am painfully aware that given my circumstances I may be better off than tons of people. People who don't have a job, shitty pay, physically demanding job etc. That's partly why I have been also feeling like an incompetent loser, because I am letting this one person get to me. Every time something happen and cock up, I always feel like it's my fault.
To the other poster, unfortunately aside from this toxic colleague, there is no one else in this role. I am unable to seek help or coaching regarding my work from anyone else. The best analogy I can think of is like if your teacher don't want to teach you properly, or purposely teach wrong thing and when you mess up/make mistake, then talk bad about you to everyone else to make you look bad. That's partly why I have been feeling so helpless and trapped
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My 2 cents worth.
1) Quit your job, but not before securing another job. To those who say there will always be such people regardless of where you are, the opposite is true: you may also find a job devoid of such people
2) Scrutinize yourself: what made your colleague to be so "mean" to you in the first place? It takes 2 hands to clap, there must be something that you did (whether knowingly or otherwise), that offended him/her. Else you may be just too sensitive.
3) It's not difficult to account for changing jobs after 9 months, even as a fresh grad. In fact, its easier to justify because you are a fresh grad: one example would be "I am clearer on what I want after my first job experience, therefore I am taking control to quit and join xxx to do xxx". There's always 2 sides to a coin, it depends on which side are you preaching.
Good luck, and update us.
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21-05-2019, 02:45 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by voskesbun
Thanks for your reply. Believe me, I am painfully aware that given my circumstances I may be better off than tons of people. People who don't have a job, shitty pay, physically demanding job etc. That's partly why I have been also feeling like an incompetent loser, because I am letting this one person get to me. Every time something happen and cock up, I always feel like it's my fault.
To the other poster, unfortunately aside from this toxic colleague, there is no one else in this role. I am unable to seek help or coaching regarding my work from anyone else. The best analogy I can think of is like if your teacher don't want to teach you properly, or purposely teach wrong thing and when you mess up/make mistake, then talk bad about you to everyone else to make you look bad. That's partly why I have been feeling so helpless and trapped
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How are you now? Did you managed to solve your problem?
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21-05-2019, 07:03 AM
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Next time, find out about toxic colleagues and culture as soon as possible, within your probation period. That way, you can quit immediately and not put down the job as part of your work experience.
Valid reasons to put:
- toxic culture (yes be honest)
- health issues (be careful, because this may backfire)
- taking a break to care for close relative (tell a lie if you have to)
- other urgent family matter (eg lawsuit, elderly overseas relatives here for visit)
- you signed up for an entrepreneurship course (go find something and sign up)
- you started a small business with friend or relative and it didn’t work out
Or just plainly lie on your CV. Pray that you don’t get caught.
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21-05-2019, 07:08 AM
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You can learn to be better than that toxic colleague and one day give him the same treatment he gave you. And then tell him, “Serves you right.”
If it’s just knowledge about the internal processes, it can be learned with time.
One day you will be better than him at work. And that day is the day you seek revenge. Get him fired.
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22-05-2019, 12:23 PM
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I agree with the last 2 pointers.
Before you quit your job, take a deeper look into yourself and ensure it is not your character flaw. I faced the same situation as you, but I took it as a challenge to make the person like me or at least improve the situation. I still have occasional anxiety attacks and dreading Sunday, but I proved to myself I am in-charge of the situation.
An advice was given to me, which I felt was very wise. Don't change job to escape from something, change job because you are genuinely interested the new job. Else, you will not be able to escape the 'dreading' feeling.
Good luck!
Quote:
Originally Posted by Unregistered
My 2 cents worth.
1) Quit your job, but not before securing another job. To those who say there will always be such people regardless of where you are, the opposite is true: you may also find a job devoid of such people
2) Scrutinize yourself: what made your colleague to be so "mean" to you in the first place? It takes 2 hands to clap, there must be something that you did (whether knowingly or otherwise), that offended him/her. Else you may be just too sensitive.
3) It's not difficult to account for changing jobs after 9 months, even as a fresh grad. In fact, its easier to justify because you are a fresh grad: one example would be "I am clearer on what I want after my first job experience, therefore I am taking control to quit and join xxx to do xxx". There's always 2 sides to a coin, it depends on which side are you preaching.
Good luck, and update us.
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04-06-2020, 01:03 AM
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Hey! I too left my job due to anxiety and stress attack. I end up crying at night overthinking about the workload.
I gave up and left. No regret. I think it is fine to leave your job. We got valid reason and it is enough that we do not push ourselves further. Yes, working hard is good on paper, but when your mental health is affected, then it becomes hard and damaging!
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05-06-2020, 01:00 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by voskesbun
Thank you for your replies. I have actually located quite a few jobs in the govt that I might be interested in. I know that I shouldnt quit before locating a new job.
The thing is, how should i explain that i left my job after less than 1 year during the interview? Should i even include it in my resume?
Also I have to say that my current job, I accepted the moment they offered because I was worried I couldnt get a job, not because of interest. Which is partly why I am in this mess i suppose
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It's your first job - the explanation is really quite simple.
You want to try new things. you want to develop a specialist skill set. you would like to try out different types of jobs before deciding on what your long term career is like. you like to make informed decisions and staying in one job doesn't give you a wide enough perspective of the role/scope/industry.
Dont worry too much about this, really. most people will understand.
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05-06-2020, 01:39 PM
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Don't waste your life working.
My company asked us to go back to work. Even though we can work from home.
Yesterday after the news report got alot of companies kena fined bevause of this...
They send email highlighting that the company didn't force us to go back to work.
So today I didn't go back to work. They ask why I'm not at work.
What a joke.
I told them I will report them and the email is the evidence.
I'm prepared to lose this job. Don't give a **** anymore
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06-06-2020, 10:43 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Unregistered
Don't waste your life working.
My company asked us to go back to work. Even though we can work from home.
Yesterday after the news report got alot of companies kena fined bevause of this...
They send email highlighting that the company didn't force us to go back to work.
So today I didn't go back to work. They ask why I'm not at work.
What a joke.
I told them I will report them and the email is the evidence.
I'm prepared to lose this job. Don't give a **** anymore
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wa nice, report those fiends
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