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Old 16-11-2020, 12:50 PM
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I am a male in my 40s, single and have been unemployed for almost a year. Left my previous job as an executive because of low self-esteem, anxiety and depression. The job market this year has obviously been horrible and my issues above became worse with application after application rejected.

Recently I finally managed to get a job and I am starting next week. It needs a lot of people interaction which is also something which made me leave my previous job. I tend to think too much about what colleagues, bosses and others think of me and my work performance. But I don't think I have any options here, its take this job or remain unemployed.

Another challenge I face is that I am basically by myself. I am not close with my family and don't have a social circle. Call me a loser, a weirdo, a hikikomori. But all these years I have put up a false front at work and in public. Its a miracle I am still alive today.

I fear going back to work because the workload will be high, I will need to put up a show that I am 'normal' to my future colleagues and worse of all I will need to interact with them and answer questions about my personal life, unemployment and all that.

If there were a hole in front of me now, I would jump in and never be seen by the world again.

When women return to the workforce after child-rearing, being a home-maker, they may face the same issues. But everyone is more understanding and there is official and unofficial support. I may be a unique example, but my issues are also real, I have nobody to turn to and as a man, society expects me to manage them by myself.

Not asking for sympathy but wonder if any other guys out there are in the same boat as me and what did you do to overcome this?
Hi there, first of all I understand your feelings of low self-esteem and anxiety. Like you, I have had moments of self-doubt before but I eventually learnt to overcome it to some extent. Perhaps you want to let me know your handle so that I can PM you?

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