[DarkFuture]

Hi guys, just wanted to share my experience. Maybe also a form of outlet for me to vent my frustrations.

I am 33 years old. Have been unemployed for the 6 months and will likely be longer. Worked previously mostly as contract admin staff. In 2016, decided to take a part time degree course in Accounting and Finance. When my contract ended near end of 2017, I decided not to continue because it was at the end of my course and also workload was catching up. Completed my studies in December 2017.

Tried looking for accounting or finance roles in Jan 2018 but recruiters told me no experience or qualification. I was still waiting for confirmation of my results then so I took on the first contract job that was offered to me which was a 3 months contract in a bank. Bank offered to recontract for another 3 months and I took it while looking for a more permanent role.

During the time, I applied for accounting roles but some wanted immediate availability. So when my contract ended, I did not renew again, partly because of the immediate availability portion and also because my role in the bank felt a little unstable. Thought that becoming more available, I would be able to find job faster.

Now available immediately, companies said no experience so do not want to hire. Very irritating when they say no exp needed but later in interview say I got no experience. Or maybe they felt I am too old. Sent out many resumes but got rejected for most. Was offered 1 role so I relaxed a bit and did not send out resumes and even rejected some interviews. But halfway through, the company told me position was suspended by management so I basically wasted close to a month doing nothing. Felt really stupid then.

The few others that interviewed me also did not get back to me. Now, accounting roles also don't seem too stable and appealing to me anymore, especially after long period cannot find job.

Now spamming resume for about everything except sales. Not sure if I am too picky or what. Some companies say overqualified on paper. Some say no experience. And its always a waiting game to be called up for interview. Even if go interview also don't feel as confident as before and I think it affects the interview. At the back of my mind now also is if the job can be long term because scared that I will come out and become unemployed again.

Don't know what to do now. Thought that studying will open more doors for my future but now it feels like it slams down on it instead. Made so many wrong choices and regret now. Spend the day just drifting around aimlessly. Tried to upgrade myself, pursue hobbies and be positive but cannot keep my spirits up at all to focus. Some days will just break down and cry. Sometimes think of ending things once and for all.

Sorry for the long rant. Just hoping to vent some of it out of my system.