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Being ruthless to be rich

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Old 29-05-2017, 12:23 PM
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Default Being ruthless to be rich

Hi everyone,

Feeling a little low concerning my salary so at the risk of sounding stupid, I hope some of the big shot pro's can give advice.

First see, I'm really not a loud, show-off, fast pace guy. I see my life as very relax, just work hard, stay in condo and be contented. So far, my income is very good, but not great. Full disclosure, I'm 32, earning $9.2k base, $11k with bonus / month.

How I'm feeling is that I want two things say before I'm 35: 1. A condo at Tanjong Pagar, 2. A BMW 5 series. However, I still want to be the simple guy that the common man down the street can relate to and lim kopi with. My friends say that to attain what I want, I need to make like $25k / month. But when I see people who get there, it's as though they're all alpha, greedy, ruthless, full of vagularities. That's not me.

My question is this: 1. Did you feel your had to step on people to get to $25k / month? 2. Was reaching $25k / month all it's cracked up to be?

It's funny. When I earned $4k / month, I thought the guy who made $10k / month was the bad guy. Now that I'm there, I'm really not a bad guy at all.

Cheers,
A Normal Guy


Last edited by anormalguy; 29-05-2017 at 12:27 PM.
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Old 29-05-2017, 12:27 PM
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No advice sorry but which line are you in? Just curious, fresh grad here

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Old 29-05-2017, 12:51 PM
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I highly doubt you will find any true earners on 25k/mth, posting away on this forum. This forum is mostly made up of undergrads, fresh grads and junior execs, some posing to be what they are not.

Anyway, I think at 32 and at near 10k/mth (assuming non-commission role), you should be very satisfied with where you are in life at the moment. Perhaps it's time for you to look at how to generate passive income instead of aiming for the status symbols at this juncture.

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Old 29-05-2017, 12:59 PM
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Not commission role. Fixed salary with descretionary bonus.

Yeah, I see what you mean. Let's just say that there's pressure from societal circles that has driven me to attain these status symbols, though part of me does want them. We'll leave out the details here.

It's something like I'm facing a battle between wanting be a normal guy and conforming to these societal circles. That's why I was seeking opinions from someone who has reached that 25k/month mark. Were you always patient in the journey? Was he ruthless (not that he would admit it)? Could you get there and NOT exude a demeanour that you trampled on people.
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Old 29-05-2017, 01:36 PM
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I am 28. Don't think I can reach your pay at 32. So I think you are doing well. I dont think you need to be ruthless. Time to get additional sources of side income to reach 25K per month target.
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Old 29-05-2017, 05:25 PM
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250k-350k per year in the past few years here. No, I'm not a nasty person. There are many high earners who are quite down to earth. Maybe the alpha males / females are making much more.
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Old 29-05-2017, 10:50 PM
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Firstly you don't need someone who makes more than you to tell you the right way to lead your life, you should listen to someone whom you respect by leading their life the right way rather otherwise you're already leaning toward what you are avoiding.

Anyway among-st those I interact there are two sorts, one who like to define their lives via showing off (buy branded, post regularly on facebook to show off etc) and the ones who does what's right because they enjoy it but keep it on the down low.

Oddly enough the former are usually the "nouveau riche", they just made it like to buy tons of branded goods and show off, usually not that generous (both wealth & manners) and interacting with them is hollow. The latter of my associates are business people, they have properties, businesses, super cars mostly old money usually keep in their circles and interestingly do not post much on facebook except some business trips but more importantly talking to them you learn alot business experiences challenges etc.

If you feel that you need to step on people, degrade people or make 25k per month to join their clique I would say you might wanna consider changing your circle of associates.

Or you can take a trip to our nearby 3rd world countries and see how the less fortunate live, that might also give you a wake up call or rather bring you back to where you were before now.

Finally to answer your question no one does not have to be an ass to be successful but this is heavily subjective on the work environment, if you don't wanna be that guy consider changing that too.

Quote:
Originally Posted by anormalguy View Post
Hi everyone,

Feeling a little low concerning my salary so at the risk of sounding stupid, I hope some of the big shot pro's can give advice.

First see, I'm really not a loud, show-off, fast pace guy. I see my life as very relax, just work hard, stay in condo and be contented. So far, my income is very good, but not great. Full disclosure, I'm 32, earning $9.2k base, $11k with bonus / month.

How I'm feeling is that I want two things say before I'm 35: 1. A condo at Tanjong Pagar, 2. A BMW 5 series. However, I still want to be the simple guy that the common man down the street can relate to and lim kopi with. My friends say that to attain what I want, I need to make like $25k / month. But when I see people who get there, it's as though they're all alpha, greedy, ruthless, full of vagularities. That's not me.

My question is this: 1. Did you feel your had to step on people to get to $25k / month? 2. Was reaching $25k / month all it's cracked up to be?

It's funny. When I earned $4k / month, I thought the guy who made $10k / month was the bad guy. Now that I'm there, I'm really not a bad guy at all.

Cheers,
A Normal Guy


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Old 30-05-2017, 12:15 AM
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From the tone of your post below, must say I do detect a hint of boastfulness. But that aside, to help yourself answer your own questions are these questions:

1. Look around you, How many older colleagues are there and how long have they worked in the company? That is, do people in your line of work last the distance? If you are working in the admin service (civil service) then yes perhaps, there is high likelihood that there is longevity in your job.

2. Once you established that you are not likely to be retrenched, then you can think about splurging on non-essential big ticket items like a BMW and a condo. Both are non essential because there are cheaper and perhaps better alternatives. If you are indeed in the CS, nobody cares a hoot about the type of car you drive nor the condo you live in unless you keep boasting about them. So do these big ticket items matter in your line of work?

3. You already know yourself to be a "good" guy. That means taking on "alpha male" personna on a daily basis will only cause stresses in your life. You may not like (or worse hate) the role you eventually get yourself into. That could also lead to early / premature retirement either from burnout or stress. The question is : Do you want to aim for the top spot or the sweet spot? The sweet spot is a point in your career ladder where you enjoy your work and at the same time are comfortably remunerated.

4. Do you believe in work life balance?

I have worked 32 years in one job/one company. I am in my sweet spot in my career and I am looking at working till 62. I started with a HDB flat and a jap car when I got married. Now we have 2 condos, 2 cars, and a passive income of $160k pa and yearly savings of $350k to $400k. Networth fast approaching $7M.

Best of all, I still shop at NTUC and Sheng Siong. Lim Kopi at my regular coffee shop. I dont wear fancy clothes and dont give a hoot if people think I am one old uncle - which of course I am. I am living the life I want and not one that my associates expect of me.

Quote:
Originally Posted by anormalguy View Post
Hi everyone,

Feeling a little low concerning my salary so at the risk of sounding stupid, I hope some of the big shot pro's can give advice.

First see, I'm really not a loud, show-off, fast pace guy. I see my life as very relax, just work hard, stay in condo and be contented. So far, my income is very good, but not great. Full disclosure, I'm 32, earning $9.2k base, $11k with bonus / month.

How I'm feeling is that I want two things say before I'm 35: 1. A condo at Tanjong Pagar, 2. A BMW 5 series. However, I still want to be the simple guy that the common man down the street can relate to and lim kopi with. My friends say that to attain what I want, I need to make like $25k / month. But when I see people who get there, it's as though they're all alpha, greedy, ruthless, full of vagularities. That's not me.

My question is this: 1. Did you feel your had to step on people to get to $25k / month? 2. Was reaching $25k / month all it's cracked up to be?

It's funny. When I earned $4k / month, I thought the guy who made $10k / month was the bad guy. Now that I'm there, I'm really not a bad guy at all.

Cheers,
A Normal Guy
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  #9 (permalink)  
Old 30-05-2017, 09:38 AM
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My 2 cents worth.

I am a typical alpha female while my husband is more low profile and quiet. I earn about $280K per annum while he earns $450K per annum. Of course, he is 10 years older than me in his mid 40s now. He works hard and get things done, but he is not the type who draws attention to himself. Ironically, he is a lawyer, so all the typical stereotypes on lawyer are completely not applicable on him.

Over the years, I came to realize that there are all sort of people who have progress in their career. Some who are cunning, some who BS a lot, some who are hardworking and get things done. For a big organization to succeed, unfortunately, you need a mixed of these people. If everyone is hardworking and does the work, and nobody is BS-ing to get business in or raise the profile of the team, there is no progress as well. You also need to be in the right place at the right time.
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  #10 (permalink)  
Old 30-05-2017, 12:00 PM
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Since you are now so rich, are you planning to buy a GCB?


Quote:
Originally Posted by Unregistered View Post
From the tone of your post below, must say I do detect a hint of boastfulness. But that aside, to help yourself answer your own questions are these questions:

1. Look around you, How many older colleagues are there and how long have they worked in the company? That is, do people in your line of work last the distance? If you are working in the admin service (civil service) then yes perhaps, there is high likelihood that there is longevity in your job.

2. Once you established that you are not likely to be retrenched, then you can think about splurging on non-essential big ticket items like a BMW and a condo. Both are non essential because there are cheaper and perhaps better alternatives. If you are indeed in the CS, nobody cares a hoot about the type of car you drive nor the condo you live in unless you keep boasting about them. So do these big ticket items matter in your line of work?

3. You already know yourself to be a "good" guy. That means taking on "alpha male" personna on a daily basis will only cause stresses in your life. You may not like (or worse hate) the role you eventually get yourself into. That could also lead to early / premature retirement either from burnout or stress. The question is : Do you want to aim for the top spot or the sweet spot? The sweet spot is a point in your career ladder where you enjoy your work and at the same time are comfortably remunerated.

4. Do you believe in work life balance?

I have worked 32 years in one job/one company. I am in my sweet spot in my career and I am looking at working till 62. I started with a HDB flat and a jap car when I got married. Now we have 2 condos, 2 cars, and a passive income of $160k pa and yearly savings of $350k to $400k. Networth fast approaching $7M.

Best of all, I still shop at NTUC and Sheng Siong. Lim Kopi at my regular coffee shop. I dont wear fancy clothes and dont give a hoot if people think I am one old uncle - which of course I am. I am living the life I want and not one that my associates expect of me.
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